So last night while on the train going to rehearsal I had pain shooting up the right side of my spine. It felt like a jolt of electricity. It made my body jump and I had to gasp. If it had lasted more than a moment I would have audibly cried out and probably would have been in tears. I don't know what it was or what it means and I don't have a doctor I can call and ask.
I decided then that I really have to be done with all the bullshit in my life before it physically destroys me.
Bryson said I should make a list. I really hate this whole list theory. I did it when I was in counseling, multiple times, and now I have a list and what the fuck do I do with it? but here it is.

I want to live a more healthy life.
Yoga/Pilates 2-4 times a week, depending on what's going on and such
I want to learn to be a more creative cook with the food in my fridge so it doesn't all rot and I want to buy local organic produce
I want to be able to grow a plant without having it die. I'd be happy to start with just one but eventually I would like a whole olive grove
I would like more time to sew and knit and be able to sell a few things on Etsy and at Depart-ment
Actually I think that is what I want to do. I want to have my own boutique. I can sell just my stuff or other stuff too. Opening my own place has come up a few times in the past and I think that's it.
This office stuff bores the hell out of me and it is only sending my paycheck to the chiropractor right now. I don't have a personality working in an office. I really miss my personality.
I would rather sew something all day than sit in front of a computer. Bryson prefers Excel spreadsheets.
So what's the next step? This is the key thing that I often have trouble figuring out. Business classes, Books, Fashion business management at Columbia, BARF! how about Fashion Marketing at Parsons in New York with a semester in Paris?
Because I really, really would like to travel more. I love learning about foreign places and I love languages so put me in a plane and fly me anywhere, even the middle of a corn field would be fine by me.
So help me out, give me ideas and share whatever it is you know with me. I really need it right now because its only 10:30am and my back is killing me...

1 comment:

sushi said...

i love lists!